Stillness – Listening to the voice within
On June 20th, 2017, my 49th birthday, I announced that I was going to be doing 50 new things before turning 50. It’s been quite an exciting year and I am looking forward to the last stretch. True to my style, I had to do something challenging and. I am happy to announce that today I am heading to Merritt for 10 days for a SILENT retreat.
No Talking, No Phone, No Writing, No Reading, No Eye Contact, No sign Language, No eating after ten, No coffee. Just me and my beautiful mind.
I have enjoyed seeing people’s reactions when I tell them this is my 50th birthday present to myself. I love to travel. I could have chosen to go to Peru or the South of France (2 places that are on my radar) but I chose the Silent retreat. As I get ready to depart, I have mixed emotions. I am scared, anxious and curious as I truly have no idea how I am going to survive the 10 days. Focusing on why I chose to do this in the first place helps me snap out of the emotions.
I am a systems thinker and problem solver by nature. My mind is forever busy. STILLNESS is an action that I admire in those who can achieve it. Stillness of the mind includes resting one’s mind as well as pausing the mind’s activities. One of my favorite hymns is “Be Still and Know” This 10-day journey at Vipassana is my effort to experience stillness.
Vipassana means to see things as they really are. It is said that Vipassana is one of India’s most ancient techniques of meditation and is an art of living. It is a non-sectarian technique that aims for total eradication of mental impurities. Vipassana is a way of self-transformation through self-observation. It focuses on the deep interconnection between mind and body, which can be experienced directly by disciplined attention to the physical sensations that form the life of the body, and that continuously interconnect and condition the life of the mind. It is this observation-based, self-exploratory journey to the common root of mind and body that dissolves mental impurity, resulting in a balanced mind full of love and compassion. (This paragraph was quoted from the Vipassana website).
Our ancestors didn’t have as much mental noise as we do. They had no 24-hour television networks, cell phones, other cool gadgets etc. For them, stillness was a way of life. For most of us in today’s society, stillness is a rare commodity.
I truly thank my loving husband and daughter for supporting me and being behind me on this journey. I am not sure what I will gain from this process. One thing I know for sure though, is that I will be alone with my mind. I will achieve moments of stillness at some point and I will celebrate the moments even if they might last for one minute.
While she was quarantined for a blood illness, Robin Roberts said, she was alone a lot, but she was never lonely. She could hear her thoughts. She could tell what’s important amongst the busy world. She learned so much from that quarantine so now she takes quiet time every day. Time to just be alone with her thoughts.
I will be blogging about my experience after the retreat. I will also be publishing the amazing 50 things I got to enjoy in my last year as a forty something. Life is such a beautiful gift. I am choosing to do that which makes me happy, hope you are as well.
